Can I bust a dart off you?

This week’s food for thought… is smoking ramping back up?

Ask yourself this - do you bust the old durry just to be social?

As I sit hunched over the keyboard in my usual Sunday hung over state, I’m toying with uncertainty on whether to have Chicken Treat for the second time today. But one thing I do know is that the last thing I feel like is a cigarette. Ironically, just 20 hours ago I was sitting outside a club on a kerb ‘busting a durry’.  I admit, YES it’s a filthy habit and I loathe smoking, however, after a few beverages I’m impartial to the cheeky dart. Aren’t we all?

While my judgment might be slightly skewed given my slightly intoxicated state, I can’t help but wonder if smoking is on the rise. Has it become cool to smoke again? Is there a recent apparent increase in young adult smoking? Or do we just find our selves lighting up to be social. 

Given any day of the week you’d never catch me at the smokes counter in Coles buying a carton of Winnie blues, but chances are come Saturday night there is a high possibility you could find me chasing a cheeky smoke off a random and then troubling them for a light. Until today, I was fairly resigned to the fact that smoking had become a big taboo in our society, given it has all been but eradicated from enclosed spaces. Smokers have now been driven outside and sort of outcast in a way. But it seems as the weekend swings around that's all but forgotten and it becomes a social ritual. I went to gig recently and I spent the majority of the time outside in the courtyard talking with strangers. Cigarette in in one hand, drink in the other, bonding over a silent killer. At one point it seemed there were more people outside than what there were inside. I think I listened to about one song and my memory of that is very hazy.

Maybe there are two kinds of smokers after all. There are those who have an addiction to nicotine and then there’s a new breed that light up to be social and don’t particularly take anything from inhaling and filling up their lungs with smoke. 

Is social smoking just a fad or is it here to stay? Maybe I will need to stop off at that smokes counter after all and invest in my own pack and lighter if that’s the case.

Bye for now – I’m off to get that half chicken and chips after all.

Cuttsy

I'm now twenty one

This week's (well I should say month as I have been very slack) food for thought.... the big twenty one!

I hit twenty one on the odometer a few weeks back, finally clocking the big number. Officially leaving my adolescent youth behind, I am now in the threshold of adulthood. As I awoke to a string of good wishes, I remember thinking three things: how old I had become, where had the time gone and how little I had accomplished. In the depths of my morning depression I sought salvation in the internet - like you do – to solve my quandary and was quickly reassured by an appealing article in Time US claiming “ahead lays a straight track, open air, solid ground and your own work – a life.” Let’s just go with that!

Still, as motivating as that article intended to be, I couldn’t help but think about how quickly this year had gone. I remember making the remark to a friend in February how this year would be filled with weekends spent celebrating 21^st birthdays and not even giving my own a second thought (being a November child).  But before I knew it, the day was steadily approaching. Facing the dilemma of whether to have a party or put the money towards an overseas trip, it dawned on me that I would only be given this opportunity once, so I might as well make it a memorable one. It’s just a shame I got so recklessly intoxicated and the latter part of the evening is all but obliterated from my memory. All I really had to show for it the next morning was a nauseous hang over and a lost iPhone and wallet. While the sceptics out there (the whole four people who subscribe to this blog) might deem it a complete waste of money, looking back I am glad I decided to have the party. Apart from some late night deplorable antics, the night itself is something I will look back on with the fondest memories. I can’t think of a better way than to spend an evening with 40+ people that have been such a huge part of this 21 year journey and it was great to hear the speeches from close mates that paid out a few complements, touched on some funny memories (some I would like to forget) and triggered some laughs from the crowd - even if they were at my own expensive.

So as I sit here writing this as a twenty one year old, I can’t help but wonder what I’ve learnt so far. This is what I came up with so far:

• A childhood fascination with vacuum cleaners is strange (get your minds out of the gutters);
• Strategically lining your toys up might lead people to think you have autism;
• Blue Heelers wasn't the same after Maggie died;
• A diet of chicken and chips is not a healthy one;
• 14,000 feet when jumping out of an aeroplane is extremely high;
• Surviving 24 hrs in a middle eastern airport can be done;
• Downing 35 shots will leave your body in a comatised state;
• The neighbourhood doesn’t quite share the same appreciation for midweek drinking and the uni life as you do;
• Games that involve getting naked should not be played in people’s kitchens;
• Late night drives to maccas when heavily intoxicated will more than likely involve you spending time at a police station;
• Wearing band aids on your nipples and then go swimming is not socially acceptable behaviour;
• Accepting the fact you will not be a sports visionary;
• One shouldn’t jump through a skipping rope engulfed in flames when you’re uncoordinated and intoxicated;
• Susan Boyle is one of the worlds rare finds;
• Crocs are not a popular shoe choice; and
• Hangovers are incurable - deal with it!

While most people tend to be jumping ship and getting married and having babies at this age, I think it might be time to pull the passport out again, tie my shoes and pack my bag and see what next adventure awaits me. That or I should probably get back to work.

Here’s to the next 21 years!

Bye for now,

Cuttsy

Are you for Siri?

This week’s food for thought… my new friend Siri

A combination of drunken antics and a growing sense of animosity toward pre paid phones led me to make a new friend this week. Her name is Siri…just to clarify it’s not Tom Cruise’s daughter as I saw someone on Facebook mistake her for, that poor bitch’s name is Suri.

According to the ‘techsperts’ Siri is “the voice-activated ‘personal assistant’ that is a talkative tool that helps schedule appointments, send and receive messages and perform any number of other routine tasks.”

 

Initially I was fairly blasé toward the idea of this ‘sci-fi dream of a computer that talks back in a robotic female voice’, but it wasn’t long until I quickly found myself quizzing Siri on the meaning of life, asking for information on the weather – even informing me whether or not I needed a rain coat, enquiring how many calories can be found in an apple and the rounding out with a joke she threw in about 2 iphones. I then found myself hurling abuse at her just to see if I could make her crack; I couldn’t. 

In my quest to find out what else Siri has to say, I stumbled across a Tumblr blog called, ‘Shit that Siri Says’ on which people post their odd question-and-answer exchanges with the app. Among some of its more creative entries:

While Siri can be snide and is unable to tell me the meaning of life (who can really?), she can sure help me with other routine mundane tasks and given time I think she will one day hold the ultimate answer (and in my opinion the meaning of life) – how do you cure a hang over?

Until such a time, I think we will leave it there for tonight. Hang on I'll just check with Siri...

Bye for now,

Cuttsy

Joggers nipple

This week’s food for thought… lactating nipples

My chafing is such a bitch, it’s like someone razored me in my boobies”

-       Sean Tolkey, The Big C

I had to laugh when watching an episode of the Big C last night when Sean’s attempt to run a half marathon was cut short because of some excruciating fabric friction in the nipple area. I felt like saying, don’t worry Sean you are not alone.

 Last week I found myself asking a mates girlfriend a question I never thought I would find myself asking, and given the look on her face, probably one she never thought she would have to answer. ‘Can I borrow some paw paw cream, my nipples are so dry’? Thankfully she was very obliging.

Where’s he going with this you might be thinking. Well, amongst a myriad of strange bodily problems that I seem to be plagued with, joggers nipple is another one (in other words bleeding nipples). Just to clarify, they aren’t dripping away at all hours of the day, only when I go running. I first learnt I was suffering from this condition  (as I’m now calling it) when I went for my first 10km run. I came bounding through the door expecting a round of congratulations from housemate at the time, only for her to ask me why my white singlet had two large brown stains in the nipple area, looking as though someone had thrown choc milk at me. I kind of wish they had.

In an attempt to rid myself of this problem I decided when holiday in Thailand some time soon after, I would put band-aids over them to avoid this embarrassing moment from reoccurring. Problem solved I said to myself. Only I forgot I had put them on and after finishing a run in the hotel gym I thought to myself, what better way to cool off than a dip in the swimming pool. Off goes the shirt and as I enter the water I can’t help but notice some strange looks from fellow hotel guests. Probably just admiring my freestyle stroke I thought. Thinking nothing of it I exit the water, towel adorned around my neck, shirt still off and I make my way through the hotel back to my room. Its only when I entered the bathroom that I realized that I hadn’t taken the band-aids off when swimming and it suddenly dawned on me that they weren’t in awe of my bilateral breathing abilities, instead thinking why on earth does this idiot have two band-aids in the shape of a cross on each of his nipples. I’m surprised I didn’t go in to cardiac arrest as I ripped them and shrieked in horror.

Do you suffer from jogger’s nipple? Or am I the only one, along with breast-feeding mothers. So if you do see me running, don’t be alarmed, I haven’t been slashed across the chest. Or on an evening out if you find me rummaging through your drawers or looking very attentively in your bag, I’m not stealing, simply trying to catch a glimpse of that magic red cream and hoping for a bit of relief.

Bye for now,

Cuttsy

I'm in London still

This weeks food for thought… one year on

It is a bittersweet feeling to know one year ago I had spent my first night at the University of Hertforshire, in a single bed adorned with sheets made out of industrial sandpaper and a mattress that contoured with the shape of my body. With jet lag neatly in tow, I vividly recall its side effects and the urge I felt to slip in to my skins and go for a run at 5am to explore the town site that would become my home for the next 6 months. After acquainting myself with the likes of ASDA and the Galleria, the realisation dawned on me that Hatfield wasn’t exactly the heartbeat of the motherland, nor was it the new ‘London’ as splashed about on a number of billboards.

Looking back those first few days were a combination of utter excitement and sheer terror. For some unapparent reason it hadn’t really dawned on me just how far I had removed myself from the familiar.  I’d been so preoccupied in the weeks leading up to leaving Oz that I hadn’t really considered the scale of condensing my life in to 24 kilograms of luggage and moving half way across the world where I did not know a single sole. I was definitely wading in unfamiliar waters. Facing the very real prospect of spending the next six months of my life without any friends I remember saying to myself as I wandered over to my first international students seminar “have you just made the biggest mistake of your life?” Ironically enough it was here and over the course of the week that followed where I would meet the people I would spend every day with for the next six months. Many of who became very close friends, and still are. What an adventure we shared! My only regret is that we didn't stay longer.

For anyone considering the prospect of exchange, I couldn’t urge you enough. It really was a life-changing experience, from learning a new culture, to making new friends from diverse ethnic and national backgrounds. In the end you gain a better appreciation of other cultures, as well as your own.

So here’s to England - what an escapade!

Bye for now

Cuttsy

Switching off from social networking

This weeks food for thought – could you switch off from Facebook?

We've truly reached a new level of technological time wasting, and it's called Facebook. I often wonder if our fascination with this social networking phenomenon is doing more harm than good. Is Facebook a social utility that helps us to communicate more efficiently with family and friends, or just a big fat time waster? 

Without doubt Facebook has become part of my habitual routine. It seems to be set up to try and draw you in and spend as much time on it as possible. Too often I find myself steering away from uni work and setting aside a break period so I can login and read the latest edition of status updates, wall posts and cringe at unflattering photos I’ve been tagged in. The problem is I become so absorbed that my 15-minute breaks turn in to an hour.

I’d hate to think how much time I have spent on Facebook over the years. I will admit I am a fairly avid user. While I won’t give up social opportunities to use Facebook, I will sometimes pull the iphone out on an evening out and have a quick squizzie. We’re really no different to drug users – its an addiction what ever way you look at it. Too often we are scampering around looking for an internet connection so we can get our next hit.

The reality of my addiction surfaced months ago when a mate of mine told me I spent too much time on there. He quizzed me on the profile pictures and recent status updates of a handbook of people. All of which I answered correctly. But does this make me a better friend? Or just someone that has perused their wall a little too much?

This friend deactivated his account last week. He’s been raving about how much more productive he has become without the thought of Facebook in the back of his mind ever since. While I congratulate his efforts of breaking the habit, I don’t know if I could be out of the loop. It’s this realisation that scares me a little. Why am I so dependent on something that prior to late 2008 I never used? I managed to hold a vast array of full functional friendships, where communication followed fairly freely without a wall, status updates and tagged photos.

But its not all grim, if you too can’t possibly fathom the idea of switching off, I read an interesting article today which provides some handy tips to avoid wasting too much time on ‘the book’. Take note of the following:

1)   Ignore the requests

2)   Stop the constant emails

3)   Avoid games and third party applications

4)   Go offline chat

Or if none of the above works, just quit Facebook all together. I hear Google+ is the new next big thing. Who needs 500 million friends anyway?

Bye for now, 

Cuttsy

R.I.P iPhone

This week’s food for thought – obsessive iPhone love.

In a ‘slightly’ intoxicated state last night my iPhone took a dive into a puddle of water. In a more sober condition this morning, I’ve learnt apple products are not waterproof and the seriousness of the situation is starting to dawn on me. Daunted at the prospect of having to part with it, even the idea of having to return to a normal phone is a frightening indication of just how reliant I am on it. But it got me thinking, I survived the first 19 years of my life without one and so did the rest of civilisation, surely life would go on in without it… wouldn’t it?

A recent study showed that iPhone users would give up their toothbrushes before their devices! What does that mean? Either iPhone users care less about personal hygiene or they really love their iPhone. I have a feeling it’s the latter. Ironically, I was having this discussion with a friend yesterday, whose iPhone has become an extension of his right arm. I quizzed him on the prospect of giving it up and he shot me a look like I’d just asked him for a vital organ. He told me if would be impractical to part ways with it.

He made a valid point. Without running the risk of sounding like a hypocrite, the iPhone has saved me on a number of occasions. I was in Freedom recently and needed to transfer more money on to my credit card. So I just whipped out the iPhone right there at the counter and in a matter of moments it was done and the transaction was processed. It also made travelling in Europe a breeze.

But is it a vital necessity?

While YES it has made everyday life a little easier in some regards, I question whether we really need access to facebook at the touch of a finger swipe? Or the ability to send drunk hey tell messages? Or access to internet banking so we can transfer funds when we need another 10 drinks and a little extra for a kebab and taxi ride home?  And access to maps, have we forgotten about a little thing called a UBD?

Are you in love with your iPhone? Do you think you could sustain a normal life without one? If I’m being honest, I don’t know if I can.

Bye for now.

Cuttsy