This week’s food for thought – excessive (and unnecessary) perspiration
It is killing me to admit this, but I have to face reality – I am in denial about my sweating problem. For months my body has felt the need to excrete copious amounts of bodily fluid, all the while I have just been reassuring myself with the notion “hey you have just come back from England, your body temperature gauge (is there such a thing?) needs time to readjust to the balmy Australian climate." In my defence, I have just lived in a country where you would describe zero degrees as a warm day and the occasions where a scarf and gloves were not firmly attached to your body, were that of a rarity. However, unbeknown to me, it turns out that this tirade was not fooling anyone. Lets be honest, there is nothing remotely attractive about sweat. Especially at a 21st where it looked as though I had taken part in a water bomb fight and then overheated so badly I had no choice but to fashionably tie my long sleeve shirt around my waist (as per the image below)
More recently, a BBQ I hosted turned in to a sweat intervention, when my health problem became the hot topic of conversation. You might be asking, how does ones sweat take control of a social situation? Well, as I was cooking the bbq I became increasingly aware of the formation of beads of sweat that were beginning to ooze from my forehead. I was just waiting for someone to say something. And like clock work Kades – ever the comedian - pipes up with “Cuttsy those sausages don’t need any more salt.” It was on for young and old after that, with the conversation and jokes flowing freely (much like my sweat) for the next 15 minutes. After much consultation with yahoo health (and self diagnosis as a Diaphoretic) I decided to take my findings to the doctor to see if he could shed light on my ‘condition.’ While sitting in the waiting room today with people that actually had legitimate illnesses, I quizzed him about eratic body temperatures and unwarranted perspiration. While I could lie here and say he looked at me as though I was some sort of medic marvel, he instead had an a expression that would accompany a verbal response of “you're a cockhead.” However as he couldn’t pin point the problem we will go with the medical marvel angle. As you read this I'm probably just about to commence fasting so that I can undertake a series of very important medical tests tomorrow morning. I’ll be sure to keep you posted of any changes or improvements. So now you know . . . and next time your out and dressed up to beat the winter chill, don’t be alarmed if you catch a glimpse of me in a pair of shorts and singlet looking as though I'm shooting a rexona advertisement – the before shot!
Bye for now
Cuttsy
No comments:
Post a Comment